The Past Is The Past…right?

I recently started cleaning out my garage in order to make more room around my pool table, and to start using it more as pool table as opposed to just “table”. I came across a couple of boxes of photos with some dating back as much as 20 years — found a great photo of me, my kids, my grandfather, and my dads (Not a typo. I’ll explain later.) — and I also found things that went directly to the trash can. In a couple of other boxes of miscellaneous this-and-that stuff I found my old journals, and they made for an interesting read. Read more of this post

Was My Daughter Hit On?

This morning, my daughter told me that she received a compliment on her shoes — her old, beat-up, comfy, rainbow flip-flops — from “someone” in the tutoring center at school the other day. I asked half-jokingly what “his” name was, to which she said she didn’t know his name. I then proceeded to share with her that a guy wouldn’t complement a girl on her shoes unless he has an interest in her. She then proceeded to tell me that I was wrong.

I need your opinion on this:

Special Fathers’ Day Wishes

A moment, for some special Fathers’ Day wishes:

Fathers in the Military
It’s a life you chose, and it has taken you far away. You fight for not only our freedom and rights, but for those of your children. You sacrifice being with your family, and risk the ultimate sacrifice while doing so. May all you give up for your child never be forgotten. Happy Fathers’ Day.

Fathers Gone Too Soon
Whether your child was yet unborn, or fully grown, your life here with us ended too soon. But in your time with us, you brought life into this world. You made a contribution that remains, that grows, and that reminds us of you. Circumstances beyond your control took you away, but our thoughts of you remain constant and loving. Happy Fathers’ Day

Fathers that Stepped Up
You came into the life of a child somewhat unexpectedly. When you met their mother you knew it was a package deal; a woman you grew to care about, and her child. Whether or not that child’s father was there, you gave of yourself. You let them know that you cared, and that you were, you are, someone they could look up to, and count on. Happy Fathers’ Day

Because you Father
You give so much in all that you do. You give more of yourself than anyone should have too, and you do it not because you must, but because you love. You make sure that your child is taken care of, and ensure that they know they are loved. You fill the gap created by the absence of another, and you help to minimize the feeling that there is something missing. Because the man that contributed to your child’s existence is not there, fully or in part, whatever the circumstances of their absence, you ensure your child has all they would “normally” get. Not because you are a “father”, but because you father your child. Thank you for being that parent that not only mothers their child, but “fathers” them as well. To the mom’s that do it all…

And So It Begins

There are some events that have occurred in my life that are very easy for me to recall.  They are memories that give me pleasure to recall, or that are a very significant point in my life. These events usually concern my children.  As we head into the final days of my daughter’s years in high school these events are flashing through my consciousness at an ever increasing rate, and I’m swimming a sea of emotions and memories.  Over the next couple of days I will be writing these memories of my life with her so far.

The Beginning Read more of this post

Hurting A Friend Sucks

For the past few days I’ve been absent from the online world; Twitter, Facebook, online dating sites, IM, everything.  I had a lot on my mind after my not-as-anonymous-as-I-would-like Twitter account was found by a friend of mine, and her realization that a tweet I had made was about her; a not so flattering tweet.  The tweet hurt her feelings, and that upset me.  So for the past few days I’ve been busy considering what to do with my identity — keep it or let the whole thing go — and trying to figure out if this whole “writing a blog” thing was worth it. Read more of this post

Guilt, or Not Guilt

Yesterday I had a chance to spend a little time with one of my sisters and one of my fathers, but I didn’t.  I made a conscious choice not to, and that kind of bummed me out.  Not because I feel bad for the choice I made, but because I don’t feel bad.

The Reader’s Digest backstory
My family tree is pretty confusing; think banyon tree.  I’m a reunited adoptee, and the child of divorce parents, and my dad is remarried, and I have step siblings, and… lets just say that Hallmark loves me.  Unfortunately, last year my my birth-father had a stroke and is currently in an assisted care situation.  Wait, I need to back up further…

Read more of this post

Algebra In The Dating World

A few weeks ago, I was contacted by someone much younger than myself; a 20 year-old, who we’ll call TY.  I figured this must be some kind of spammer, Nigerian 419 scam, or someone with “services available to a generous gentleman”, because seriously I cannot picture a 20 year-old attempting reach out to me.  So I played along and replied to the e-mails.  It was all too perfect: she lived in my town, she’s just looking for new “friends”, and according to her my profile made it seem like “it would be fun to get together”.  Uh huh.  A total scam.  Having worked in then computer security field I was very careful not to reveal any identifiable information about myself: I have alternate e-mail aliases, IM accounts, means to text message, and even a different phone number to give out if that were ever necessary.  So lets play.

Didn’t I Mention That I Have Kids?

A comment on my recent post about someone not fully reading my profile mentioned “Men don’t like it when women say their kids come first.”  But that’s not just limited to men…women don’t like it either.

In the realm of close, inter-personal relationships — you know, that whole dating thing — the longer I know you, and if I like you, the more I’ll want to spend time with you.  But if I’ve only recently met you please don’t expect me to immediately give up every waking moment of my life for you; especially time with my kids. Read more of this post